Spanx are for kids, silly rabbit!

Hey, hey, hey!  Thanks to Cool Mom Picks, I've discovered a solution to the "Waaahh...I want to wear a dress to school today!" battle that happens every  morning occasionally in our house.  Check out these bloomers for kids:

My first thought when I saw these was "hey, I need a pair of those!"  And then I realized I have a pair.  They are called Spanx.  And they most certainly are not for hanging upside down on the monkey bars.  Although Katie Holmes might have seemed a lot cooler if she had been wearing a pair of violet knickers instead of Spanx in this photo:

By the way, that is TOTALLY what I look like in my Spanx.

You know I never want to make my male readers feel left out, so please, guys, go out and get yourself a pair of the Spanx for men.  They call it "man Spanx."  Oh, that is rich.  You will absolutely look like this if you do:

OMG, that is almost as funny as the men's swimsuit option I posted on my shopping blog.  Seriously, guys, leave the vain self-obsession stuff to us.