Thursday, September 17, 2009

Thank You, I Know I'm Huge

Okay, with six weeks left to go in this pregnancy, I think it is a good time to remind people that:

  • Yes, I realize how big I am.  Every morning is a battle to find a pair of MATERNITY pants that fit.  Maternity.  Doesn't that imply that they should fit during pregnancy?
  • Yes, I'm as uncomfortable as I look and I am in pain.  I'm trying to stay quiet about it, but if you insist on mentioning how miserable I look, you are going to get a miserable response.
  • No, I don't know any more than you do if the baby is coming soon. 
  • No, I no longer care what I look like.  This includes my hair, my makeup, my clothing, and my flat shoes that barely fit my swollen feet.
  • No, I am not bigger than last time, nor am I that much bigger than I should be at this point.  But thank you for asking.
  • Yup, I am incredibly grouchy.  Get over it.
I would like to start my own list of things to never say to a pregnant woman.  I'll get to that as soon as I'm done feeling grumpy (probably in about 1 1/2 years).  Here are a couple that are recommended reading for any of you who are in contact with an expectant mother:

This article is a little wordy, but content is good, in my opinion.

This one boils it down to a top ten, a la David Letterman.


  1. amen sister. If my creepy neighbor comments one more time on how much "heavier" i look i might pelt him with a rock.
    And if anyone else says "wow you're big and you STILL have TWO MONTHS to go", i might pelt them with two rocks.
    And why oh why would anyone ask me if I"m ready for the sleepless nights again? Is it a fun torture game they're playing? then they get three rocks.

  2. Maria, your comment cracked me up. I can just see you pelting people with rocks! You are so sweet, you would probably apologize right after you did it.

    I just re-read this post, and boy do I sound like an ungrateful grouch. Bad day. I think I need to go back and re-read my "Honestly Grateful" post a couple of times.

  3. Thanks, Jen. This is EXACTLY how I feel!